The Modern Gentleman

You can't make people love you, you can only make them pretend to love you. Don't force it, let it flow naturally.

She wants to hear from you in the morning. Shows her how meaningful she is to you.

I don’t trust easily, so when I tell you I trust you, please don’t make me regret it.

Funny moment

That awkward moment when you remember something funny, and can't stop smiling like an idiot.

My love notes 101

To be honest, you're the only one I've ever spent this much time and effort on. And it's worth it.

They asked me what I see in you, I smile, look down, and say nothing, because I don't want them to fall in love with you too.

A hug for you means I need you. A kiss for you means I love you. A call for you means I miss you.

When I talk with you, I can't stop smiling.

A real boyfriend: -calls you for nothing -texts you all the time -wants to see you -gets jealous -is overprotective -and loves you.

Faithful girls CRY the MOST...

Solving Promblem in Relationship

"If we want to resolve relationship problems we need to value listening and learning more than proving we are right and worthy." ~Jean Raffa

Quotes on Love and Marriage

These quotes on marriage by Rebbetzin Sarah Karmely
will show you how to be happily married every minute -
not just on your wedding day!

Marriage Quotations

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40 days before you were born, God chose your soulmate for you.
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A woman should always ask God out loud
for good things for her husband.
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The wife is the source of blessing.
Treat her like a Queen.
______________________________________________________________

Romance Quote

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After the marriage is when the romance should begin.
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A woman is as holy as a Sefer Torah.
______________________________________________________________
Abuse of a woman is as forbidden as abusing a Sefer Torah.
Neither man nor woman can permit it.
______________________________________________________________
Honor your wife more than yourself.
Love your wife more then yourself.
Do not let her shed a tear.
______________________________________________________________
It is said that since the parting of the Red Sea,
What has God been doing?
Making matches.
What is the relationship?
The nature of the waters is to come together,
but the nature of man and woman is to go apart.
______________________________________________________________

Couple Love Quotes

______________________________________________________________
This is your soulmate.
Once you’re married,
you have to know
this is the one God chose for you.
______________________________________________________________
Nobody is single.
Everyone is half a soul.
______________________________________________________________
Husband and wife:
Side by side, equal but different
______________________________________________________________
For a happy home, don’t argue about religion.
Find someone else to be your spiritual advisor,
other than your husband or wife.
______________________________________________________________

Love Saying

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When you can’t have something, you love and desire it more.
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Everybody needs forbidden fruit.
This is the great secret wisdom of Mikveh (the ritual bath).
For 12 days of the month, the wife is forbidden fruit.
On the night of the Mikveh, she is a new bride,
and her husband is a new groom ~ every month!
______________________________________________________________
Mikveh night is very special.
Plan for it.
Make it holy.
______________________________________________________________

Marriage Love Quotes

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You have to get married every minute,
not just on your wedding day.
______________________________________________________________
When the Rebbe walked through the door,
if the Rebbetzin was on the phone,
she would always say, “I’m sorry,
I have to go now. I have a guest.”
______________________________________________________________
The best gift you can give your children is a happy home.
______________________________________________________________
A woman can make or break a man with a single word.
______________________________________________________________
Imagine the Rebbe is in the room with you.
Would you still say those things?
______________________________________________________________

Quotes on Marriage and Joy

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Joy breaks through all barriers.
______________________________________________________________
Every problem in the home can be resolved with joy.
______________________________________________________________
Any lack we see in others is present somewhere in ourselves.
If we fix that thing in ourselves,
we will understand and forgive it in others.
______________________________________________________________
In the end of days, Moshiach will have a lot of explaining to do!
______________________________________________________________

Quotes on Marriage by Sara Karmely
Adapted from a lecture “What Happens When Soulmates are Human?"
Jan 19, 5759; Bais Chana of California; Los Angeles
From the collection, "Desire to Delight," by Rae Shagalov
© 2008 Rae Ekman Shagalov All rights reserved.

Marriage Problem Advice

Marriage Problems Help

Having a marriage conflict?
Get marriage problem advice!
What makes or breaks a marriage?
These inspirational and motivational quotes and tips
will help with common marriage problems.

How to Resolve a Marriage Conflict

_______________________________________________________
The fate of a marriage
depends on each partner’s ability to love,
to care, to feel attachment,
develop intimacy, express emotion
and to commit to resolving marriage conflict without conquest.
_______________________________________________________
Sometimes, the ability to monitor and resolve conflict
is what makes or breaks a marriage.
_______________________________________________________

Marriage Problem Solving

_______________________________________________________
It is incorrect to teach compromise
as a solution to marriage conflict.
What is compromise?
Compromise means you don’t get what you want
and I don’t get what I want,
or you only get part of what you want
and I only get part of what I want.
Either way, no one is satisfied.
_______________________________________________________
More poignant and useful is the concept of sacrifice;
transcending one’s own need through empathy.
_______________________________________________________
Sometimes (not always!)
what’s better for “us”
is forgetting what’s best for “me”.
_______________________________________________________

Clear Boundaries Help
Problems in Marriage

_______________________________________________________
He will kiss me with the kisses of his mouth.
-Song of Songs-
_______________________________________________________
At Mt. Sinai, the Jewish people were so filled with the passion of the Jewish soul to get closer and closer to God - three times God had to tell them not to touch the mountain.
_______________________________________________________
In a good marriage,
there is a passion to share joy and be close,
yet both partners have to maintain separate identities;
have to have some boundaries.
_______________________________________________________

Marriage Problem Relationship Tip

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Marriage problems will not always be solved intellectually.
Sometimes they can only be solved through attachment. Attachment to the marriage, if not to each other.
_______________________________________________________
Adapted from a lecture by Rabbi Dr. David Fox
“Love & Marriage Problem Advice: A Torah Perspective"
Los Angeles Vol. 15.40
© 2008 Rae Ekman Shagalov All rights reserved.

Long Distance Dating Advice

When doing long distance dating,
Meet within a few weeks of writing,
emailing or speaking on the phone.
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Don't create an emotional relationship
before you actually meet or you are risking
great heartache, God forbid!
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The first date should be short.
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Even if it doesn’t go so well, go out again.
Give it a chance.
It's hard to be authentic on a first or even
second date when you may be nervous.
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With long distance dating, it is tempting
to spend every minute of every day with each other.
Don't do it.
Don’t go out every day.
Explore on your own in between dates.
If you speak on the phone on the days you don't meet,
Keep it very short.
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Don’t overdose on each other.
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Don’t see each other too frequently.
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Give yourself time and space to reflect and recover
To stay connected with your own true self.
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Don’t expect to click on the first date.
What you will experience, if it is right,
is a gradual deepening of the relationship.
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Try to Have No Expectations on the First Date

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If the conversation doesn’t go smoothly, don’t worry.
First dates are awkward.
You don’t know each other yet.
==========================================
A good first date is a cup of something hot
and a piece of cake - Short and Sweet.
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A good second date is dinner.
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If the first long distance dating meeting goes well,
see each other every few weeks
with phone calls and letters in between.
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What Are You Looking For?

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--Are your values and goals similar
--Compatible personality
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Look at the quality of the relationship

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Can you trust this person
not to use your vulnerability against you?
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Is there any point of connection
that could lead to a second date?
Look for it!
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People grow at different rates
and change throughout marriage

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You can be holding in different places,
as long as:
--the gap is not too great,
--one does not bring the other down,
--one does not try to change the other,
--you set a common standard for the home and raising children.
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When Long Distance Dating,
Date long enough to see the flaws

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In long distance dating it's hard to spend enough time
with each other to really see the flaws.
If you think you're in love, it's even harder.
Love makes the beloved seem perfect.
Long distance dating also makes
the other person seem more perfect.
But you must look for the inevitable flaws
or weak points in the other person and ask yourself:
Can I live with those flaws?
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Adapted from a lecture by Rosie Einhorn & Sherry Zimmerman
“Long Distance Dating”; 2002; vol. 15.45
© 2008 Rae Shagalov All rights reserved.